Inseparable Desire
by JustKaty
Summary: Severus and Lily have gone there separate ways in school. But are either of them feeling lonely without each other? Are either of them trying to pull there friendship back together? Is there unknown feelings between the two or is it just there hopes? Set in Sixth year. Snape/Lily pairing! Obviously AU!
1. The Book

**I don't own the Harry Potter or the characters. They all belong to J.K Rowling.**

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**A/N: **I know this chapter is short but they will be getting bigger as the story progresses. This is my first Harry Potter FanFic so please review to tell me what you think about it and how I can improve. I've tried to get as many of the mistakes out but I know there will still be some.

Please follow!

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oOo**Inseparable Desire**oOo

It was a peaceful autumn day at Hogwarts. A faint breeze filled the air with the relaxing sound of rustling leaves. There weren't many students in the building, as well as many professors, as most decided to spend it with classes outside to enjoy the nice weather.,

With this strange turn of events, the outside had become too crowded to concentrate, and many students like Severus, who wanted quiet, stayed in.

He sat in the far corner, on a long oak desk in the Library. His head was deeply buried in a book about potions and their effects. He had read this before, but not for some time. He rather enjoyed diving into books and attempting to remember every word, gathering up all the glory that it brought the reader. He never wanted to miss any small detail.

From the way his back was hunched over, and how his ebony eyes rapidly moved from side to side, anyone would think he was in a trance, where no one or no thing would catch his attention. And that was true. Nothing silly would ever grab his attention when there was a better and more important activity at hand. An activity that would feed his brain with knowledge for the future-something that Severus always fed on. Plus he had to keep a straight head as he could easily remember a wrong formula.

But something suddenly filled the air. It was a soft sweet essence of lavender and jasmine. It completely took all his attention away from the task at hand... and every other guy that was probably there too. This was rare for Severus, as he found his mind slowly drifting away. It felt as if his head was becoming heavier, and he could feel the thumping of his heart. His body oddly became hot as beads of sweat covered his neck. Severus briefly looked up and around the room, curious to know where the intriguing scent came from, and who was doing this to him. There were a couple of girls seated down between one of the muggle book aisles- Hufflepuffs they were, but they had been there before. He knew for a fact it was not them. This was a scent he had smelt before-only lighter and less noticeable. This smell was almost overpowering.

Before he knew it, his dark eyes locked onto a girl he knew all too well.

Lily Evans.

Sixth year Prefect, top charms student, and most beautiful girl in the school. She was not popular as she chose her friends wisely, but had all the guys after her. They would practically crawl on there hands and feet begging for a chance- losing every strain of dignity in the process. Much like what Severus had done after 'the big incident' of fifth year- the talk of the century that was.

But for some odd reason, she had yet to take anyone up on there offers. Anyone Severus had heard of that is. He was not one for gossip, but he always tried to keep an ear out for anything to do with Lily.

He repeatedly cursed himself every time he saw her. Flashbacks would rapidly take over his mind and all he could see was Lily angry, no furious with him. Severus sighed, if he had not been such a dunderhead and called her that one forbidden word four months ago, he would be able to just get up and sit over there with her - with no worries of rejection. She would have greeted him with her soft warm smile and they would have chatted away. Why couldn't he have just cursed at her instead? Like a normal guy would. But Severus was far from normal. He was a sixteen year old with a tainted soul - made possible by his abusive family. A family that did not even want him. He would of still had a chance at being more with Lily. He knew it was a far stretched scenario and would have required a great amount of luck on both sides.

_More_

_I always wanted more..._

But that was gone, all gone and he knew it. He was left broken hearted and cold - more so than before. So why did he keep thinking about it?

Was it because he did not want to admit to what had happened? That the only person who ever loved him and he ever loved now loathed his soul? That his burning love for the dark arts was too strong for a girl like Lily to bear? That he actually _did_ love the dark arts in the first place?

Severus had to admit he found taking refuge in the Dark Arts eased his pain. As each day went by he became deeper and deeper into the dark hallow. But he was able to let off steam as he had channeled all his anger and grief into inventing spells; dangerous ones that could seriously injure or even kill. Even Severus feared to test them on any living thing, including himself. They were his secret and no one was to ever know.

He looked back over to Lily who was scribbling away in a white and black leather book of parchment. There was a golden latch and lock around the edge that caught his eye. He inwardly smiled to himself as he knew it was from the muggle world.

_Seriously Lily, anyone here could break that lock within a second!...She's not stupid though, she probably charmed it to bite off whoever's fingers. _

Severus sighed, _how I'd love to see what's inside..._

Just then the bell suddenly rang. Severus looked down at his half read chapter and frowned, he would have to finish this later. He picked up the stack of books on the corner of the desk, and proceeded to his NEWT Potion's class.

He had just made it to the doorway before he lost his footing and fell to the ground.

_Just what I needed. _Severus looked up to see who saw and grumbled at the small group of Gryfindore's laughing loudly at him. He swore his face turned a shade of red. Severus hastily picked up everything and shuffled his way to class. The best thing was that Lily would be there...

oOo**Inseparable Desire**oOo

A group of Slytherins were gathered in a deserted hallway on the fifth floor. Small bits of light tunneled through the shaded windows, and the smell of old fumes filled the air. This was after all a deserted and forbidden part of the castle.

"The Dark Lord gave me the mark!" A boy with thick brown hair named Avery stated proudly. Everyone's eyes began to twinkle with envy. Ooh's and ah's filled the musty air.

The mark indeed look painful as lines of brunt skin were yet not fully healed. But that did not seem to discourage anyone.

"As soon as you're seventeen you'll have one just like it!"

Grins filled the room and everyone gazed over to Severus, "You're next Snape!"

Severus smirked proudly. This was the best thing that he could ask for his birthday. Being 'marked' and to have a purpose in life. This brought a strange joy to him. His happiness was short lived and he suddenly frowned. His eyes followed Avery who was looking down at his hands that were filled with books. He walked over and knocked them from Severus' grasp.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here." he taunted as he pulled up a familiar black and white leather book. He twirled it around a few times and watched as Severus gasped and his eyes grew wide.

It's Lily's book!

Severus quickly reached for it but Avery pulled away at the last second.

"Something you don't want us all to read?" Laughter filled the air. Severus shot him a glair as Avery smirked- he was clearly enjoying this.

Without hesitation, Severus flipped out his wand and flung Avery black on his ass. Severus stormed over, snatched it away and left everyone standing there stunned and confused.

He had to get out of there. Severus walked quickly, almost running out and down the hall. He could feel his heat pounding away with pure excitement. He had Lily's book and disarmed Avery!

He was beyond excited at what he held in his hands. This was better that any Death Eater news. This was pure gold. He hated to think of what would happen if Avery read what was in it. He didn't think his eyes were any better but he knew he would not utter a word to anyone about what was inside.

Down the staircase and through the entrance, Severus ran up into his dorm and locked the door. He threw down his other school books, kicked off his boots and robes(leaving just his shirt and trousers) and settled onto his bed.

Here it was. The book he wanted so desperately was now sitting in front of him. He could almost feel the burn of excitement as everything Lily was so close to his eyes. Just one flick of his wand and he could know everything.

Severus's long fingers brushed over the golden lock. It was a simple muggle contraption that would easily open. Heck, Severus did not even think he would need magic to break it but would anyways. He brought out his wand and hovered it over the lock. A ping of guild suddenly washed over him.

_It's not your book Snape. She'll hate you for entirety if you open that thing. _The small voice in his head screamed.

_What do I have to loose? She already hates me. _He retorted back.

_You will hurt her even more Snape. Do you really want to do that?_

Severus Sighed.

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**A/N: **This story will start to make more sense by the next chapter. Please give it a chance! Rating might change as story goes on...


	2. A Chance

After thinking for quite some time, Severus made his decision. He knew Lily did not care for him now, and likely would never again, so what did he have to loose?

_Nothing. _

A part of him did feel guilty for doing this. After all he was betraying her trust in some way. But for the first time in his life, that part was not big enough to take over his curiosity for the book. He normally would never do something like this, something that could - would possibly make Lily hate him even more. But oddly he could not stop. Even offering him a high rank in the Death Eaters would not even suppress his curiosity or make him change his mind. He _needed_ to see what was in that book.

It was almost as if someone had cast a spell upon Severus. A spell that enhanced his need to see what lie beneath the cover. But he figured that was unlikely as it was a book. And it was Lily's book after all.

Severus swore on his magic that whatever he read would never leave his mouth little lone his mind. Which, in general, would be difficult as his Occlumency was still far from reliable, but was better than most would ever be able to accomplish. He would be able to keep out most, but not all. And by most he meant any prying students around him and Lily. So he considered it was safe.

But did that make anything better? Was it acceptable because he knew Lily and was not doing this for anything evil, but for an insight into the life of the girl he always loved?

He sighed and pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind. He knew the answer to that question and did not like it. But with his shields up on that part of his mind - the caring part, his heart again began to pump a mile a minute with excitement. He swore it was louder than the chugging of the Hogwarts Express. And in some sense it was...To him at least.

He pulled up his right arm that held his black wand. It visibly shook with adrenaline but he could manage a few tiny simple flicks. Severus unlatched the first part of the lock and undid the golden latch. He fumbled with the muggle contraption for a moment - examining it's detailed features before placing it down on the mahogany nightstand beside him. He exhaled as he ran a cold, sweaty hand through his overgrown raven black hair.

Again he pulled up his right arm. He carefully moved his wand around the rough black edge. It appeared to be made from a cheep leather - if not faux. But none the wiser, Severus thought it looked... nice. Like something he would choose for himself... minus the white part; preferring all black.

Severus also checked for wards. If there was any, and knowing Lily quite well, he knew there would be some, they needed to be dismantled properly before he got any further. Breaching one could be a dangerous event, and depending on the ward, could result in him being painfully shocked to death or breaking out into a thousand boils.

With all the small security wards lifted, Severus flipped open the black and white cover and was presented with a simple first page that contained moving flowers and a single line of writing that read :

_Lily Evans_

Severus became intrigued as he saw her name written in ink. As always, his heart began to pound with a burning desire for her, for anything Lily. Unknowably, he ran his hands over her name and became momentarily lost in his thoughts, and a rare but small smile crept across his face.

He turned over the page and his eyes grew wide. He automatically lost himself within it's handwritten text...

**oOInseparable DesireOo**

Lily was seated down at the Gryffindor table along with her friends Mary and Laura. It was quarter to five and dinner was coming to an end. There was less than a dozen students left at each table, but there was much more food placed upon them- enough to feed the entire school over, yet again. Lily's plate was filled with chicken, rice, steamed vegetables and a dinner roll.

Her friends, Mary and Laura (Mary being a brunette and Laura having blonde hair - both with brown eyes) were in deep discussion about the Quidditch match that was to follow the next day. They were advocate fans of the game but Lily knew it was likely because of all the fit guys that were on the teams, and the chance of seeing the Slytherin team be defeated - something Lily too had to admit she enjoyed witnessing.

It was the first game of the year against Ravenclaw, and everyone could predict what the outcome would be.

"So are you coming with us tomorrow?" Laura asked as Lily took a bite of her food, "James will be there."

She rolled her eyes and placed her fork down. Lily loathed Quidditch. But no matter how much she protested on not going, her friends would still somehow manage to drag her to each and every one. How they did this, she did not know. But sometimes it was the only time she could spend time with them as her four NEWT classes were taking most of her time. So she always seemed to cave in for that reason.

But that was not going to happen this time as she had other plans. Plans that would not be broken. Could not be broken. Since September, Lily had not had a free day to herself. She had not had the chance to use the large tub in the prefects bathroom(as she had settled for showers). Lily shook her head and both Mary and Laura frowned disapprovingly.

"Lily," Mary began in a soft but assertive tone. She had, in some ways, always reminded Lily a lot about her sister Petunia. There confidence was equally high as well as there noses - as they did share the same standers on the 'perfect life' - with only the magic separating there views. "You're going to have to put yourself out there if you want James to think you're interested."

"Yeah, I mean, he's in a school full of girls, he's not going to wait forever for you." Laura added. "I've seen his eyes dart towards McLorn a few times."

Lily again rolled her eyes, took another bite of her food and a loud gulp of pumpkin juice. Her temper was slowly flaring but she managed to keep in at bay with only her eyes showing. She glared at them both, "how many times do I have to say I'm not interested in Potter!"

Mary put down her fork which hit her metal plate and sent a loud noise across the room. She leaned across the table, "How many times will it take for you to realize that he can give you _everything_!"

Lily did not reply. Her mind did occasionally pounder with her friends' reasoning, and at times, she agreed she was right...In some way.

There was an ongoing wizard war that had made money become extreamly tight. Even Lily herself did not have much, as did many other students. She knew it would be sensible to be with someone like Potter at times like these. It would be a safe and secure route to take. Not having to worry about money, even having enough to enjoy a few nice things. It was tempting to say the least. But with everything he had done, she could not do it. And she could not face a marriage without loving the person in return. And _that_ was surly not to happen anytime soon with Potter.

"See even Laura agrees with me, right?" Mary looked over to the blonde for support in which she gave a slight nod as if she was scared to answer this.

Lily sighed, "Is that all you ever care about? How much money he has?" Mary shrugged and opened her mouth to reply but was cut off, "Well honestly I'm surprised there."

Mary face turned a light shade of red. Laura gaped at Lily for being quite inconsiderate and rude, but Lily did not care. That was something Mary had needed to hear for some time and only now had Lily bothered to tell her. Probably because she was tired about hearing about the Toe Rag.

"Why would you say that?" Mary said slowly, her voice filled with hurt.

"Because that's all you every go on about! That and how good looking he is." Lily sighed, "I'm tired about hearing about him. I'm not interested in James Potter so can we all let it go? Please?"

Mary bit her lip as if she was weighing the pros and cons to Lily words. "Fine but if I ask him out, don't become all jealous and stuff. You would have had your chance."

With the silence between them, Lily reached into her bag to retrieve a book to read. And suddenly, her heart sank into her stomach.

_Oh no!_

Her hand fumbled around the insides of the brown bag she carried everyday. The light brown and white owl feather quill was there, her notes and a scroll of parchment were there as well as her school books but one thing was missing. Probably the most important thing of all...

_My Diary._

Lily's heart was now pumping a mile a minute with noting but fear. She thought she might have a heart attack there and then. She picked up her bag and dumped the entire contents onto the table and frantically searched. Her green eyes were wide with panic as she knew she had put what seemed like her entire life into that book. Things no on else were to ever see.

Just as she was doing this, someone from behind her came up and snatched the quill that was in her hands.

With a sharp turn, Lily spun around and glared at a smirking Toe Rag who was flipping her quill in the air.

"Give. That. Back!" She said furiously and his smirk grew even wider. He moved closer a few more inches and shoved a hand in his black trousers pocket.

"Hey Evans." He grinned.

Potter was becoming very close to six feet. Which in all, made his crude activities even worse as he towered over most of the school. His hair was far more shabby as the years went on but it coordinated well with his rugged - but expensive looking clothing. Every time Lily had seen him, he was like this. She called it the 'fight look' and knowing how he was, was probably not far from the truth.

He whipped up his hand with the quill in it and stroked it along Lily's face. She squinted at the sensation and pushed it away from her. Potter let out a small chuckle as he saw Lily was now infuriated with him. His goal was complete.

"Oh come on, have some fun," He teased and Mary and Laura laughed idiotically, "You don't laugh enough you know. It's not going to kill anyone." Her friends laughed once more.

"Give me that!" She snatched her quill and quickly packed up her bag. She did not have time for this. Her diary was missing and anyone could have it, heck anyone could have read it by now...

"Have somewheres' better to be?" He teased. "Would have thought you'd like to be seen around me... like most girls do around here." He looked over to Mary and Laura who were inwardly batting there eyelashes at him.

Lily sighed, Why_ does every girl like him? Even my friends are starstruck by him._

Lily could not believe him at times. He had also become more self absorbed as the years went on, when he should have been getting better. Lily had far more important things to do than to deal with Potter. "See you _girls_ later."

"What? I don't get a goodbye?"

Meanwhile at the same time, Severus was seated across the hall over at the Slytherin table reading her book while finishing off his meal. He had changed the cover to look like a Dark Magic one so no one would ask questions... especially Avery.

He was shell shock by some of the things Lily had written. He had read some entries that were about her friends and school, some that were about her personal life and others that were about him.

And he was not shocked at the ones that were about him. What shocked him was what Lily wrote about her personal life. He in general, knew a lot about Lily - he would admit that. But some of these things were personal. Very personal. He did not know what he was expecting when he read her diary. But surly it was not this.

Severus knew the things girls wrote in them, that was a given for any guy, popular or not. But he never did think _she _of all girls would write these things. He did not know why.

Maybe it was because he was her friend and did not think of those things when around her. Sure he loved her and wanted her in his life romantically, but he never did think of her past being anything but sweet and innocent. Severus briefly remembered what she had written four entries ago. It was only one line of writing, but it made his jaw drop wide open, and made him realize that girls too had those thoughts and dreams as well...

Severus being a quick reader, had managed to make his way through a quarter of the book. It was not as thick and wide as one of his Potions text books as it was more close to one of his Dark Arts books; a personal size. He knew all of the pages had yet to be filled and knew there were only a few entries left to go. Severus continued...

_October 4th, 1976; __Another Severus entry._

_This is the first entry I've written in awhile... and about him. _

_This year so far has been a hard one, more so than I expected. With being a prefect and studying for my NEWTS, I don't have much time to myself. But the time I have had, I've been able to think things over in my head - properly. And this will sound different to everything I've written in past entries, but I need to let it out._

_To start off with it, I want to give Severus another chance. Lately I've been thinking about him and I realize that him not being in my life has left a huge gap there. __But I know that another chance will be another one that fails. He's had more chances than I can count and every time he fails. Sometimes I wonder if he ever did mean that he would try. Because it surly did not seem like it..._

_... _

_...The Severus that he is now scares me. Him and his friends are always getting up to no good and I fear about what he does, what he will do. There are many stories around that they kill people like me, people who are muggleborn and are considered mudbloods. Would that mean he would kill me? If You-Know-Who told him to do it? I just don't know. And it scares me. He's gone too far in and will never be able to get out. It's only months now before he's one forever._

Severus was quite aware he was gaping at her soft writing yet again. How could Lily think that little of him? Did there years of friendship prove nothing to her? It was now obvious to Severus that she had no clue just how much she meant to him. If she did, she surly would never think those things. He grumbled in annoyance. If she only knew...

Severus never did want to scare Lily. Was that why she ended there friendship?

_Possibly. But I don't ever remember doing any Dark Magic around her since third year... What is she talking about? What has she seen?!_

He did not know what took him aback more; _That_(Him scaring her and thinking he would kill her if The Dark Lord told him to)or the fact that she was willing to give him another chance. Something Severus never thought in a million years he would get.

"Are you coming to the game tomorrow? I can get you good seats." Severus herd his least favorite voice fill the great hall. He looked up and saw a livd Lily glaring at the Great Hall doors. She did not reply. Many of the students watched as his voice could be heard from afar. "Might even be able to get you a personal meet and greet with the Gryffindor seeker!"

Lily expression changed. She trampled over to Potter with a faint smile on her face. _Oh just great, she's thinking about it!_

She whispered something to him in his ear which made Severus cringe. She was close; very close. How he wished that was his ear.

She giggled, pulled back and left the room with Potter stunned still. There was a look of confusion upon his face. Or maybe it was a look of shock as she might just have accepted his offer after all these years.

_No! Lily would never do that! She hates him as much as me!_

_Does she Snape? He does have quite a few things up on you... _He grumbled at the voice in his head, which was sadly right. If Severus had any chance at renewing there friendship, he would have to make a few changes in his life. Changes so that he did not scare the love of his life away from him forever.

And maybe, if he was lucky, he would someday become more...

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**A/N: **Thank you for the reviews and follows. They mean a lot to me. Another chapter should be soon. I will try for one more before the new year.


	3. A Smaller Gap

It had been two weeks since Severus found out about Lily's true thoughts. Two weeks in which he had been in a daze; a daze of happiness if you would call it. There was a slight leap in his step which many did not notice, like Severus himself. But the few that had, the select few, swore he must of been on something as he was never this way. Not even on Christmas.

Severus scribbled down the last of his notes off the board and into his black notebook. His quill flew across the page left to right as his thick handwriting marked the page, with not so much as a single blotch of stray ink tampering it. He knew he was the first to finish as he had, most times that is, already experimented with the potion they worked on in class.

This was just a repeat for him. A refreshment if you'd call it.

It was not that Severus looked to have no errors nor to appear perfect in the class. That was not ever his motive. It was that he enjoyed potions as it too was an output along with the dark arts he so often practiced. But this output was not for his frustration and grudges he had with his everyday life, no. It was an output that relaxed him to a point he sometimes did not know ever existed within him. A point only a few could ever reach...

His NEWT level class was far too easy for Severus himself, which almost everyone, including Slughorn, knew about Severus Snape. He was always the one who altered the instructions; making them far better and much more easier. And was always the one who finished first; with his work never slacking the least.

He was gifted in the art which many fought to be. It was never an easy task brewing and the patience and time it took was what imitated wizards and witches the most.

Severus held his many secrets about potions tight. Those secrets had been the key to his success in the class since first year. They were not secrets that were hard to discover, no. They were secrets that anyone could discover if they too had the interest and the will to do so - which was a rare combination for potions as Severus only knew of one other student at Hogwarts that had that skill.

When Severus ever thought about her, it was not just lust he felt. Although that part was still _very_ there, Severus did not just see her as someone who he could sleep with. To him, she was still his best friend - as she would always be; whether she liked the thought or not. She was the best friend he had ever had. Sure he had Avery and Mucliber, but they were more of a friend that was because of a common interest. And of course because they were roommates.

He knew deep down that he would always need her. Although he did not like that as he feared that he could not achieve what Lily wanted in him, and would become weak in that sense like a grovelling fool, it was what it was. All he could do was try. And he would, for her. Though he could not help the terrible feeling he had in the pit of his stomach that it would not work...

Suddenly the inside of his cheek suffered a painful bite that snapped him from his thoughts. Severus gazed around the classroom and saw that he had become lost in his thoughts - a first for Severus. He decided to stop where they were and focus back on the task at hand...How did he even venture off in the first place?

Severus was the last to gather his charcoal coloured cauldron, and the vials of ingredients from the chestnut cabinets upon the faded gray classroom wall. He was glad that with one of his changes would speed up the potion so he would not receive zero marks if he did not finish. After all he was five minutes behind everyone else - that was enough time to prepare most of the ingredients.

The cauldron was set up and connected to the gas source. He proceeded and followed all the steps for the Draught of Living Death from _his_ copy of A_dvance Potion Making_. He made his certain changes and an hour later he was done - again before most of the class.

And he thought he would have not enough time.

Severus smirked at the clear liquid that smoldered with a thick musty cloud of smoke. The sent filled his large hooked nose in a awe worthy manor. He enjoyed the relaxing sent of any brewed potion as he had become use to the sent from an early age. He loved the feeling of pure relaxing he received when brewing. It was as if nothing else mattered in the world. Like nothing was wrong.

"Ah! Mr. Snape, you've done it again. Ten points to Slytherin!" Severus smirked and summoned a medium size faded brown jar, filled it to the rim with a sample of his potion, and corked it with his name on a small white tag attached to a cotton thread.

_Severus Snape. _

_Draught of Living Death._

_Brewed October 18th, 1976_

_NEWT Potions._

He placed it upon Slughorn's desk and proceeded back to his desk in the very back, but he stopped along the way. He saw most of the class struggle with the Advance potion. Some looked as if they had not even started.

Severus saw some that were cutting the bean with the wrong tool as they used a dull knife that was meant for plants - a tool that was not even listed within the potion's equipment list. Severus grumbled and shook his head, how could such dunderheads make it into this class?

Severus watched as a Hufflepuff student added his Infusion of Wormwood before he even measured out the correct amount. The boy's face looked as if he had had it with the class and did not give a care in the world to what he was doing. It took all of Severus's might not to go over there and banish it and prevent any more loss of ingredients.

A large navy blue puff of smoke arose from the boys cauldron prceaded by a high pitched squeek; almost like nails to a chalk board. Slughorn came over, frowned at the... potion? and banished it. The boy's face had somehow turned into that shade of blue in which Slughorn sent him down into the infirmary with. Severus grumbled, _What a dunderhead_.

He proceeded towards his seat in the very back. Severus eyes sat upon Lily who's fiery red hair was upheaval as it looked to have been caught in a wind storm of some sort. Her green orbs were wide with frustration as he could tell she was livid at the potion's book. He watched as she mumbled the words over and over, her eyes scattered back and forth, page to page through out the chapter. But she could not figure it out. Severus knew that.

He still thought she looked beautiful at the moment. Even more so as he could tell that despite not being able to brew it correctly, she was still gaining enjoyment from it. But he could not help but feel as if her cauldron was only seconds away from coming in contact with a nearby wall or even the floor. He knew Lily's temper all too well.

Severus inwardly smiled, this was a chance. He knew what to do. He could help her and make her potion as good as his. Surly he did not mind Lily knowledge of his secret to success. It was Lily after all.

Feeling brave, Severus moved his black school-shoed covered feet and made his way over to Lily who was now flipping throughout the whole book vigorously. A page was just about to rip and Severus cringed. He quickly took the book from her hands and placed it down upon the desk. He turned her cauldron back up and added new water.

Severus had not done much since he had discovered Lily's true thoughts two weeks ago. In fact, he had done nothing. Sure he wanted to but he had found himself become afraid. Afraid to make a mistake; afraid of rejection. He had been given a second chance and he was not to fail, not this time. He would make sure of it.

He thought it might be best if he slowly worked his way back into her life. He was afraid that if he confronted her like he had back in fifth year and begged, she would shut him down. Severus cringed at the memory.

_"I'm sorry!"_

_"Save your breath!" _

Her words were like salt to a wound.

He knew he needed to prove to Lily that he was _actually_ going to try.

He was thankful all the other students were busy with there potions and did not notice him approach her. He was glad too. The last thing he needed was having someone call him _Snilvious _in front of her.

"You should crush the bean, Lily. Like this." He took the spot next to her. He was close to her, only inches separating them apart. Severus could smell the sweet sent of the perfume she had on, the same one he smelt in the Library not long ago.

His long fingers draped over the large knife that lie upon the mahogany desk on the spiral rack of tools in the middle. He begun to crush the bean with little effort on his part. Sophophorous beans were hard, but if crushed down upon the very center(where there was a weak point) it was a simple task. Something Severus had discovered himself upon experimenting with it weeks ago.

His raven black hair curtained over his face. It just touched his shoulders as he hunched over the table he worked at. This was the main reason why Severus's back had become hunched over the years. It was not because he was too lazy to carry himself, no. It was because he had spent hour upon hour leaning over a cauldron while he noted it's every change.

It took little to no time before Severus was done and placed it in a small glass dish for her use. The black bean now had become a thick chocolate brown like goo.

Severus looked over to Lily who did not say anything. She just stood there, emotionless. As if someone or something had caught her tongue.

He took the small opportunity to have a good look at her. She had indeed grown up over the months and her features had become more mature. Her hair was a tad shorter, just falling past her shoulders now as it had been a bit longer before. It could be because it was slightly curled at the bottom?; and that too could of been because of the potion's stem. But he did not care.

Her green eyes were still the same as well as her rosy red lips. Severus noted that her ears had become pierced which held one rust coloured Garnet stone incased in a silver metal stud. One was on each ear lobe.

He looked down at his hand that held the dish. Severus peered up to see that Lily's green eyes were now fixed upon the dish as well.

Was she confused?

Severus pushed it forward and finally, her small hand took it.

"The instructions say to cut it Severus." She said in a small voice, stating the obvious. Noting that _this_ was not in the book, and that she knew what could happen if potions ingredients were prepared the wrong way.

"It's wrong. Trust me." He said. His voice sturdy and confidant as he knew this for some time.

Lily half snorted and turned back towards her work table. Severus bit back a huff and watched as Lily added the goo into her simmering brew. A puff of lilac smoke arose and he smirked.

Lily's eyes became wide and she bit her lip; nibbling on the bottom for a few moments. She picked up her stir stick and worked in the ingredients. Another puff of Lilac smoke arose.

Severus left Lily to work on her own. He knew she was good at potions, but he knew she probably had never brewed this one. She could figure out the rest on her own as there was only one other small change, but it was not necessary.

He did not know what to expect from her, but in some ways that few moments had gone better than he had hoped for. And some ways, it did not.

Severus walked back to his seat and proceeded to clean up his work area. He did not know if it was his imagination, but he swore he heard Lily whisper a fait '_thank you_' to him.

He let a small smile slip. He knew he had made the gap between them, just a tiny bit smaller.

* * *

**A/N: I got this update out before the New Year! The next update should be soon as well! Thank you for the reviews and follows! ****I tried to base Lily's hair on how Harmione's looked in the Half Blood Prince movie during Potion's class. I thought it looked quite funny and thought that probably Lily's hair would go the same. **

**Please Review and Follow! **


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